Meng vs T Rantula WCW Saturday Night 05-24-1997
This blog isn't my first crack at it.
Some people who are already reading this might know that already. Most people reading this probably don't though, because it's god.....got to be close to a decade old. I graduated college in 2012 and promptly began getting my life in order. Just kidding, I worked my usual summer job and then was unemployed for a few months. I was living at home, didn't have any real bills yet, and had no real direction. I had no fake direction either. I did have a goal though, one that was easily attainable if I just did a little hard work.
I wanted to be Bill Simmons
It's insane now, but back then it was merely crazy. A roommate of mine had gotten me into Bill Simmons and I was hooked. I listened to every podcast, , read every column, bought every book. All of It. I thought that if I had all this free time sitting around not working, I could become the Bill Simmons of pro wrestling. I was funny, I was from Boston, I liked run on sentences, I was basically his protégé, he just didn't know it yet. So I gathered my friends and pitched them the idea for a wrestling blog. It would be our Grantland. We'd do match reviews, running diaries, opinion pieces, theme weeks, and everything else Bill and company did. I would of course have my own weekly column because I was 23 and my ego was Hoobastank levels of out of control.. We just needed a name. Something that would intrigue people to visit the site. Something to pay tribute to a wrestler we all loved
ItsRainingMeng
I'm nothing if not consistent in my blogs, because I still love using a pun. ItsRainingMeng was born because we all dug Meng. It may have been ironically at first, but it developed into a genuine, real affection. One of our weekly features was "Midnight Rider Society", where each writer recommended a match that they thought our readers should watch. We also required at least one Meng match every week as well. During that process, I realized just how great Meng was. It got to the point where finding the Meng match was easy, it was the personal recommendations that were hard to find. I didn't like him just because he was our unofficial mascot, I liked him because he was fucking good. Honestly, it's a damn shame it took him so long to get him on the blog. I'm sorry Meng.
Please don't kill me
It's 1997 and we're back for a rousing edition of WCW Saturday Night. Tonight Meng will be taking on T Rantula. I decided to pick a match involving T Rantula for 2 reasons. One, his name is a pun and I fucking love puns. Two, T Rantula is a guy I've only ever heard of from the PWI 500. Its amazing how many of those names stuck with me over the years. I don't know how to tile a floor , but you're damn sure I remember the profiles of The Codfather, Judas Young, Vince Goodnight, Natrone Steele, and many others. T Rantula is a tall sumbitch for sure, he's somehow bigger than Meng. He looks like Mike Knox during his main WWE Smackdown run, except skinnier and paler. T Rantula rushes Meng in the corner which is the smartest thing he can do. Meng gets T Rantula away and now they're just punching each other. Big old meaty men slapping big old meat. T Rantula tries to hit Meng with a shoulder block, but Meng won't go down. Rantula tries again but DROP TOE HOLD BY MENG. Its not devastating or anything, but I got excited so I typed in caps. Meng gets on top of T Rantula and does the scientific wrestling hold of SMASHING T RANTULAS HEAD INTO THE MAT OVER AND OVER. Simple yet effective. After some stomps and chokes, T Rantula ends up in the corner when Meng chops the shit out of him. It's those gross chops that sound more like thuds because of how heavy Meng's hands must be. It does delve into boring kick stomp territory for a little until T Rantula makes a comeback. He kicks Meng in the face, but Meng eats it. As in he takes it, not in the way Meng ate Jessie Barr's nose once. T Rantula throws chops and a weak clothesline at Meng, but Meng won't go down. Instead Meng just kicks T Rantula in the face. While T Rantula is on the mat, Meng delivers MY FAVORITE SUBMISSION HOLD OF ALL TIME, The Tongan Death grip, for the win. I love that move, I used to do it on my brother all the time. It didn't work as well as when Meng did it. Wait is wrestling fake?
It's a fine squash, but I know Meng has had better. I know that because I probably watched all his matches he ever had. It's nice to get Meng on a blog I'm writing for again, it gives me the warm and fuzzies. That blog's time came and went. The posts are all gone now, and maybe a few people here and there remember the blog ( mainly for it's name). But remember while ItsRainingMeng may be gone Meng is forever
Hallelujah
TLDR Review
Trip down Memory Lane for Ben. Trip to Hospital for T Rantula. Our spinoff blog was going to be HAKUna Matata
If you're interested in more condensed version of my thoughts, You can check out my Twitter where I talk about wrestling or stress out during Boston Celtics games. Hell, I'll even take suggestions for matches you want to see reviewed. You can also check out my Youtube where I make weird videos where I put on wigs in front of a camera to mask my true identity.