Thursday, May 19, 2022

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Rich Myers WWF Wrestling Challenge 11-14-1993

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Rich Myers  WWF Wrestling Challenge 11-14-1993

Did you guys know Major Payne was a remake?

That's right, the Damon Wayans military movie is a remake. Blew my mind when I found out. I was in a Goodwill and I saw a tape for a movie called The Private War of Major Benson starring Charlton Helston. The Private War of Major Benson starring Charlton Heston isn't the name of the movie, it's The Private War of Major Benson and it stars Charlton Heston. Anyways, as I read the description I slowly realize this was the plot to Major Payne. That movie was a cable TV staple and never in that time did I ever realize it was a remake. So why do I  bring this up?

Bam Bam Bigelow is in Major Payne.


That's all I got. I really wanted to talk about a Bam Bam Bigelow match and I had the Major Payne factoid in my head for weeks now. It seemed comparable. I guess we should make the transition a bit smoother. Bam Bam Bigelow shows up halfway through the movie as a tough guy hired by the cadets to kick Major Payne's ass.  I also thought he was the guy that tries to beat up Cadsworth in the Richie Rich movie, but I am either mistaken or it's the Mandela effect. My girlfriend says the Mandela effect is just white guys unwilling to admit they were wrong about something. I don't think she's right,  and also Nelson Mandela is alive.  Regardless of what reality he showed up in , Bam Bam Bigelow is one of the most physically impressive wrestlers of all time. In a time period where few people had tattoos, I am old enough to remember when people from Massachusetts had to travel to other states to get it done, Bam Bam had his whole head tattooed with flames. He looked like an absolute monster. On top of that, he was one of the most agile big men wrestling ever saw. Also, pretty ageless. He had runs in every major company, and the only way you can really tell Bam Bam's age is by the color of his gear.  If you asked kids to draw their version of what  a wrestling bad guy would be, at least one of them would draw an actual photo of Bam Bam Bigelow. Well, like it'd look like a  shitty  verision because they're kids but you get the idea

It's another fantastic edition of Wrestling Challenge and going up against Bam Bam Bigelow will be one Mr. Rich Myers. Myers has a fantastic mullet, which reminds me that if this blog is still around next March I will be doing a tournament of Wimpy Mullets.  This is my personal favorite era of Bam Bam, when he was managed by his "main squeeze" Luna Vachon. Coincidently this Bam Bam squash is a short time before his 1993 Survivor Series match which is one of my favorite matches of all time. Bam Bam Bigelow, Bastion Booger and The Head Shrinkers vs Doink Butch, Doink Luke, Doink Mo, and Doink Mabel. That match won Worst Match of the Year in the Wrestling Observer, but I don't care because I'm starting my own wrestling newsletter with blackjack and hookers.

 Match is off with a big scoopslam by Bigelow, who drops an elbow but Myers quickly evades. Bigelow is unable to get ahold of Myers who gets some punches in before being leveled by a great shoulderblock. A couple moves in and Bigelow has been hitting Myers with force here. Myers AGAIN able to get some offense with a dropkick and a few punches that sends Bigelow staggering. I love when a big guy does the weebl- wobble but don't fall down sell, and Bammer was great at that. Myers tries more offense, but gets leveled by a falling clothesline by Bigelow. Basically, Bigelow fell forward onto Myers as he clotheslined him, like a sort of standing flatliner. It looked great. Bigelow hits Myers with a big splash, but when he goes for a second one that's when things get weird. 

Bigelow misses Myers and hits the post, falling backwards and getting "knocked out". Myers goes for the pin and actually gets a 2 count befre Bigelow rolls outside. At this point, Luna checks on Bigelow and stuff gets sus.  I assume that Bigelow didn't really get knocked out, the spot seemed too planned. However, I wonder if he got actually hurt because Luna  suddenly introduces a lot of chaos. As Bigelow collects himself on the outside, Luna gets in the ring, pushes and then slaps Myers. Which, doesn't get a disqualification for some reason? It's possible this was all planned, not well-planned but planned nonetheless. Bigelow charges Myers and again Myers moves out of the way so Bigelow stumbles back into a Myers roll up but a kick out.  Myers has all the momentum and goes at Bigelow onto to be dropped onto the ropes via flapjack for the sudden  Bigelow win

What a fun and different kind of squash match. Bigelow gave a lot to Myers, but everything Myers got was flash pins.. Big credit to Bigelow who really showed off his agility in this match. I think he bumped around more Myers was, but did nothing made him look bad. Not a HOF, but a fun squash fore sure.

TLDR Review
Rich Myers has an amazing mullet. Bam Bam Bigelow has amazing agility.  Its amazing Major Payne is a remake


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