Tank Abbott vs Villano IV WCW Saturday Night 02-06-2000
It is shocking that the UFC is as mainstream as it is.
I'm a 90s kid, and so UFC came around when I was very young. I don't remember the first time I saw it. Maybe it was on one of those PPV preview channels, maybe it was in a video store, maybe someone ordered it and I saw a clip. All I know was as a child I thought, isn't that the show where they kill people? That was basically how I thought it was marketed, I thought the UFC was a show where people fought to the death. It's not like UFC did much to dissuade that reputation, but I'm sure I took a big leap in logic there. UFC was forbidden in our house, but it's not like I was clamoring to watch it. I cried with Yokozuna beat Bret Hart for the WWF title, I don't think I'd have reacted well to seeing an actual murder. I was fascinated by it as a forbidden thing. The UFC section was next to the Wrestling Tapes at the video store, and so I'd look at the back of the boxes and try to figure out what it was all about. On the playground, there was always at least one kid who said they had watched UFC it but I'm going to bet they were full of shit. YOUR MOM DOESNT LET YOU WATCH POWER RANGERS KEVIN, YOU DIDNT WITNESS A MURDER.
It's weird to think about how you could be aware of things you never saw, but even as a kid without ever seeing UFC there were 3 names I am confident I knew existed. Obviously I knew Ken Shamrock from his WWF run. Royce Gracie I knew because he was the face of UFC. Then, there was Tank Abbott. There are either two reasons I knew who Tank Abbott and I can't remember why. Option one was, his name was Tank Abbott and he looked like that so there was no way I was going to forget him. Option two, he was on Friends in that episode where Jon Favreau's character joins the UFC. It's probably half of one, six dozen of another. Either way, Tank Abbott was someone that even as a child I recognized was an absolute monster. One of those guys you don't want to run into in a dark alley.
Although I mean, I don't want to run into anyone down a dark alley. It's a dark alley. It's scary
So when Tank Abbott showed up in WCW it was definitely a case of let's fucking go. I didn't know Tank's MMA win/loss record wasn't ideal, all I know was he knocked dudes out and he certainly beat the shit out of Monica's boyfriend. Tank debuted in late 1999 as part of a planned feud with Goldberg, but first he proceeded to basically squash guys for a few months. We join the Tank Abbott push already in progress as we travel to WCW Saturday Night in February of 2000.
Tonight Tank will be taking on Villano IV, of the legendary Villano family. Lucha Libre is a weak spot of mine, so I can't keep track of the quality of Villanos. All I know is they were always fun when they showed up in WCW and IV has a cool jacket with spikes on it. This is the era of WCW Saturday Night that was no longer taped in a separate location, but instead taped before what I believe was WCW Thunder. Oh god, I cannot wait to get some WCW Thunder on here. It's weird seeing Saturday Night shows in front of arena crowd, and by weird I mean it absolutely sucks. I hate it. Before the match we get the highlights of Tank's run in WCW which features him fighting La Parka. I can guarantee that match will show up on this blog by end of the year. It's a good video package if not for the generic music in it. It's the kind of rock track that would play on the menu screen of a Tiger Woods game. Tank comes out and he looks like a guy who goes to bars just to test himself against the bouncers.
Like he's too stupid to have a good time.
Tank of course wears MMA gloves and MMA tights, but he wears shoes because this is back when guys could wear shoes during fights. Tank rushes Villano in the corner and hits some stomach punches, before he judo tosses Villano. He gets a double leg and carries Villano around the ring before tossing him. Villano is throwing punches, but they aren't registering with Tank which makes him look more like a badass. Finally Tank hits a great looking right hand and Villano is out. Tank walks out of the ring while the referee checks on Villano and declares Tank the winner. The one shot-walk away aspect of the Tank character is actually very, very cool. Post-match they highlight Tank Abbott will be taking on Sid in what I assumed was The Wrestling Observer Match of the Year
Look, maybe he was awful in the ring but I think this version of Tank Abbott could have worked. I'm sure the rest of his run had bad matches, but it's hard for me to dislike it. The match was less than a minute long, he looked badass, and he punched a guy in the face .I just want to lie on a beach, eat hot dogs, and watch guys get punched.
That's all I've ever wanted
TLDR Review
Tank isn't paid by the hour. Villano isn't paid enough ( it's WCW so I'm assuming because....racism). I can't believe how much the cast of Friends got paid
If you're interested in more condensed version of my thoughts, You can check out my Twitter where I talk about wrestling or stress out during Boston Celtics games. Hell, I'll even take suggestions for matches you want to see reviewed. You can also check out my Youtube where I make weird videos where I put on wigs in front of a camera to mask my true identity.