The Blade Runners vs Sean O'Reilly & Perry Jackson
It's absolutely crazy Sting and The Ultimate Warrior started as a tag team.
Screw Lennon and McCartney. Get the hell out of here Jordan and Pippen. Eat Shit Loggins and Messina. The Blade Runners are the real iconic duo of the 20th Century. It's hard to fathom how these two guys came together so early in their careers, and continued in separate directions while still mirroring each other. Both of them became the painted face of their company in the early 90s. Both of them were critically derided ( way more Warrior than Sting ), but commercially revered. Both had some of the best wrestling names of all time.
If there was a Venn Diagram betwixt the two, it'd be pretty close to just being one circle
Obviously they were two separate people and time would bring their starch differences to the surface. However, in the early 90s they were two sides of the same face painted coin. In WWF, there was The Ultimate Warrior. A frantic ball of energy and human growth hormone who was every kid's favorite wrestler, because he was basically a giant lunatic kid. That's not a knock on the gimmick, I loved The Ultimate Warrior. I think a lot of kids loved Warrior, because he felt like us. He was full of energy, he loved to run around, and nothing he said made sense. That's basically me until 3rd grade. Meanwhile, in WCW was the man called Sting. Well, the other guy called Sting. The absolute balls to name yourself Sting, when there is a second more popular Sting . Sting wasn't just the WCW version of Warrior because Sting played an actual person. Sting was Warrior on ADHD medication. Sometimes he'd spaz out and get manic, but for the most part Sting's emotions were under control. In 1990, both of them were captains of their respective ships as each man held his company's top gold. As a kid I loved both of them, so imagine my shock when I found out about The Blade Runners
It must have been in one of the Apter Mags, but as a child I somehow knew about The Warrior and Sting Connection. Personally I think Warrior and Sting Connection is a better name than Blade Runners, but I was never a great e-fedder. It blew my mind that two of my favorite wrestlers could have ever been a team. It's the ultimate crossover that I didn't know I wanted. It was a Sting/Warrior team and if WMAC Masters ever showed up on Supermarket Sweep. GO TO THE MEDICINE AISLE HAKEEM THE MACHINE, THATS THE BEST STRATEGY. Now, history has not been kind to The Blade Runners. I don't foresee any director's cuts of their matches leaking and changing critical acclaim. While Warrior and Sting as a duo sounded fearsome in 1990, in the mid 80s it sounded like dreadful television. They were greener than goose shit, and stiffer than goose shit too. Unless you've ever touched goose shit you can't tell me I'm wrong, and if you have ever touched goose shit than your opinion doesn't matter because you are a gross individual. Maybe history was unfair to The Blade Runners, maybe they weren't as bad as people say. Sting became a really good worker, and Warrior became.....I really like The Ultimate Warrior.
It's 1986 and we are heading down to Bill Watts' former Mid-South Wrestling now known as UWF. According to Cagematch, this is very quickly after the rebrand and attempt at national expansion. Mid-South was known for their great workers, bloody feuds, and quality television. To say The Blade Runners stick out like a sore thumb would be doing a disservice to sore thumbs everywhere. Tonight The Blade Runners will be taking on Sean O'Reilly and Perry Jackson. They look like default characters from a wrestling game. I don't have a lot to make fun of them for yet.
So I hate them.
The Blade Runners are out now and they come out to some killer synth. Sounds like something Dracula would be playing in his castle if he lived to 1986. Holy shit are they big. Jesus Christ. If you thought Sting and Warrior were jacked in the 90s, let me introduce you to the 1986 pharmaceutical cocktail coursing through their veins. Warrior especially looks like he's so muscular that his arms can't move. This can't be healthy. Other than the exceptional amount of monkey hormones in his blood, Sting looks pretty close to the Sting we know. He's bigger and the face paint hasn't evolved yet , but he's got the blond hair already in full effect. On the other hand, Warrior looks nothing like Warrior. He's massive, has a rat tail, and his face paint doesn't resemble his classic paint scheme at all. Eddie Gilbert is their manager and introduces them as Rock and Sting. Wow, Warrior got the short end of the stick when they named that team. I'm calling him Warrior anyways. In what is a kind of fun prediction of his future, Warrior starts shaking the ropes as he is introduced. For that 5 seconds you forget that this is Rock and not The Ultimate Warrior. The Blade Runners bum rush the wimpies and the match is on. Blade Runners all over the wimpies with forearms that don't look painful, but given how green The Blade Runners are I imagine that's an optical illusion. ITS A SAILBOAT YOU IDIOT. O'Reilly gets thrown to the outside and starts hobbling. He either is unlucky enough to get hurt on a simple move, or smart enough to feign an injury to avoid a...well another injury. Warrior grabs Jackson and whips him into the ropes. I cant explain enough how insane Warrior's muscles look. It makes every move look difficult to do. He presses Jackson above his head before dropping him to the mat. He picks Jackson up again, but this time in a far more shitty way. He doesn't even get Jackson above his head before he bails out and drops him. Those muscles are for show I guess. He tags in Sting who ironically hits A RUNNING SPLASH for the win.
Probably for the best as ok, I kind of see The Blade Runners critiques. I didn't get to see a lot of Sting, but its clear right away he's the more agile of the two. I don't know how much stock we can take in that because a hobbled man trapped in a coal mine is more agile than Warrior. It's fun seeing the two of them together, but it'll never be as cool as if they teamed in the 90s. For now, it's just a fun origin story to look back on. The origin of Sting. The origin of Ultimate Warrior
The origin of HGH
TLDR Review
Sting didn't Stink. Rock got covered by his inability. Holy shit, how can someone get that big
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